Recipe For Life

“What would you like people to think about you when you’ve gone?”

“I’d like for them to say he took a few cups of love, he took 1 tablespoon of patience, 1 teaspoon of generosity, 1 pint of kindness. He took 1 quart of laughter, 1 pinch of concern, and then he mixed willingness with happiness. He added lots of faith and he stirred it up well, then he spread it up over a span of a lifetime, and he served it to each and every deserving person he met”

***

One thing people think about you when you’re alive, and another when you’ve gone.

You can’t persuade evidence to the contrary to people who lower your qualities when you’re no longer alive.

Death is the only thing you can be 100% certain of that it will happen. There is something intrinsically beautiful about death. Something truly lovely about the idea: delicate, graceful, and natural. Reaching that eternal peace where we are coming full circle in the world.

The first thing I read in the paper every time I lay my hands on them is obituaries. This may sound morbidly melancholic but it’s not. I wouldn’t be surprised if a fair number of newspaper readers share this same routine.

Reading an obituary is not so much an act of mourning a death but of reviewing a life of notable accomplishment and celebrating it. It’s a constant reminder of the inevitable: death.

What would you like people to think about you when you’ve gone?

Craft your recipe for life cautiously.

Choose the best ingredients (personality and attitude) and best tools (support from family and friends) to gain your fullest potential in order to fulfill your life purpose.

At times you may spill the ingredients, undercooking and overcooking them, or even cut yourself with your utensil; but it’s okay everyone makes mistakes. Crafting well-praised recipes need experience and practice. So is life. Don’t forget to take pleasure in doing it because time cannot be repeated.

You sure do want to leave a good impression so when people read your obituary in the paper they would whisper…

“What a good person… Rest in peace.”

Stormy Night

“We enjoy the day-to-day experiences but beneath the exterior, there are cracks, resentments, alliances that threaten the very foundation of our lives as if any moment our world can come tumbling down.” – Opening line of the movie My Sister’s Keeper

Classic cliché.

Every individual has a depth of secret sadness beneath the exterior that is masked with solid disguise.

We consciously or unconsciously carry that misery in our souls, which affect present and future decision-making. We put on a happy face then rip that face off and shred it to pieces behind closed door.

***

In a fine falling mist, I stand in a driving rain. The smell of thunder hangs in the air. I feel the stinging raindrops the size of pebbles pelted down on my flesh. The chill wind dances with the perennial plants.The night seems to sound only of water and wind.

The heavens pour rain thick as world’s finest drapery.

Refreshing.

A storm comes in the distance. Some will run to it and some will resist it. But my eyes turn to the sky. A storm might not be an awful thing but a refreshing thing.

I stand here, bathe in it, and accept it.

The rain is both a fading memory and distant promise. For the better.

***

'The cracks, resentments, alliances that threaten the very foundation of our lives as if any moment our world can come tumbling down' is when the storm comes your way.

The past is the past. Every individual faces his/her own storm. Each experiences different intensity. There will always be a storm coming your way.

Refresh in your storm.

After the rain comes the rainbow.

One of my favorite movies of all time. Watch it, you won't regret it. Rated #1 on imdb.com winning over The Godfather.

Programmed For Sex?

Since the surfaced of sex scandal of three allegedly high profile celebrities that caused uproar for weeks in our beloved nation, let’s talk about sex. Let me remind you, I’m not going to talk about the controversial sex video case. I’m going discuss about a different kind of sex.

I’m always curious about sex. Not human sexual recreation but rather sexual reproduction of the process in combining and mixing genetic traits to form offspring in living organisms other than human beings.

When I first consume a raw oyster, I wondered how do oysters reproduce? They can’t be having sex like mammals do. I learned that oysters use external fertilization instead of conventional male meeting the female or the female carrying the eggs to term. Female oyster releases eggs and the male releases the sperm and fuse in water. This means they simply procreate, they don’t need sex for pleasure.

Seahorse is a different story. They perform sex for a long time! Courtship can last for 12 hours. They perform foreplay by dancing *oh how cute*. With their tails entwined, the female aligns a long tube with the male’s pouch *this is when they’re having intercourse*. What unique is the males are the ones who become pregnant! They have sex both for fun and to reproduce.

Seahorse mating

Moving onto sexual relationships, monogamy is so rare in animal kingdom that only 3-5% of mammals are known to form lifelong pair bonds, ex: otters, foxes, beavers. Strict monogamy is almost nonexistent, as they do pair for life but occasionally have flings on the side. Sounds familiar? Just like marriage today, eh?

Swans, often regarded as symbols of love, in fact are known to cheat, abandon and even ‘divorce’ one another, exactly like humans.

Animals are having a hard time staying faithful, as the males are programmed to spread their genes and females to get the best genes from the best males for their young.

Is it the same for human beings?

Studies of pair bonding in animals have allowed scientists to identify several chemicals in the brain related to social monogamy: oxytocin, vasopressin, and dopamine. Although human brains contain all those chemicals, our brains differ in many aspects from animal brain. Oxytocin reduces stress in us. It may facilitate attachment by reducing stress in response to the support and comfort offered by monogamous relationship.

Then why more and more humans today develop sexual relation other than their partners?

Psychologists have offered 3 types of explanations for satisfaction declines: normal rebound, emotional erosion, and motivational erosion.

Normal rebound refers to the natural feelings of happiness and satisfaction to return to more normal level over time. Examples of the rebound are hedonic treadmill model and self-expansion model, but I’m not going to go into those *it’s going to be lengthy*.

Emotional Erosion is the inevitable arguments and conflict that arise once couples are attached exclusively.

Motivational erosion is when couples may no longer share the same relationship goals, and may no longer support one another in achieving personal goals. It reduces their motivation for being in the relationship.

What happens when a couple cannot cope with all of those? They start to look for satisfaction somewhere else.

They look for satisfaction emotionally from a pretty young thing, or physical unattached sex.

Back to the genes topic again, are we really the same as animals? Is it hard for human beings to stay monogamous because males are programmed to spread their genes and females to get the best genes from the best males for their young in order to survive?

There might be some truth in that.

We are sexual beings.

According to Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, our most basic need is physiological needs. Other than air, water, and food, the intensity of human sexual instinct needs to be satisfied to maintain a birth rate adequate to the survival of the species.

But remember, we are human beings not animals. We are blessed with minds full of knowledge. We are intelligent beings. That’s why we rule the world!

Picture this: a married man with 3 young children sleeps around and his excuse is, “I’m a male. I’m programmed to spread my genes. It’s in my blood.” But he uses condoms or takes his dick out before he comes when he sleeps with his mistress. If he really wants to spread his genes, put your sperm in her uterus! He just wants pleasure.

Any responsible human being who realizes that world population was 6.7 billion in 2008 when it was only 2.5 billion in 1950 (Unbelievable! More than double in less than 60 years!) won’t use that reason to justify reason for sleeping around when he/she is married.

You want to have fun? Go ahead and have fun! As long you’re not hurting anyone and yourself (physically by being safe and emotionally by keeping thing unattached). You're the one who's facing the consequences, no one else. And yes, that includes gossips.

But we shouldn’t declare ‘we are exclusive’ or ‘till death do us part’ if we’re not so sure we can be monogamous. Maybe we should just say ‘as long as love shall last’.

When ‘married’ beavers and otters can get down and busy with one partner, we can.

"It's not sex that gives the pleasure, but the lover" - Marge Piercy

Retreat Into Advance

Have you ever suffered an extreme fear that you experience unimaginable physiological nervous responses (shortness of breath, nausea, and finally fainting) and shocking aftermath revulsion?

It might be as simple as riding a rollercoaster with many gut-clenching inversions for the first time. Or to the near death experience surviving an airplane crash.

Everyone has his/her own tangible or intangible things that trigger the emotional response caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous and likely to cause pain or threat.

There are two types of fear: the ones that you can overcome and the one you can’t.

You’re afraid of heights? Gutsy up and try a kiddy roller coaster. You will eventually bungee jump in no time.

You’re a stage fright type of person? Practice, practice, and practice. Make your performance a celebration, not a trial. Like my father used to tell me, think of the audience as pigs. They’re all omnivorous domesticated hoofed mammals with snouts. They all feel the same as you do. Or if those things don’t do wonders for you, gulp two glasses of wine before you perform.

You’re claustrophobic? Learn relaxation techniques for anxiety: deep breathing, visualization, and other meditation exercises can be powerful weapons against panic.

Those are examples of fear that you can overcome. Remember, any learned fear can be unlearned as well.

But there are fears that you constantly store in your mental process:

Fear of your significant other would get hurt while they’re driving or traveling. Fear of your children would live well and are well taken care of if you unexpectedly die. Fear of cannot make your parents proud while they live healthily.

Fears can be a good thing for you. They can be a drive to reach your fullest potential.

Fear will always be there. After you overcome one, another will come. It depends on how you handle it.

Franklin D. Roosevelt in his First Inaugural Adress, March 4, 1933 once said, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself – nameless, unreasoning, unjustified, terror, which paralyzed needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.”

Make fear as the media to convert retreat into advance.

***

Original Maniak is back together

Diamonds on The Sea

I opened the sliding barrier and I felt the immediate breeze of fresh air. My lungs inhaled the life-supporting component of the air and instantaneously polluted by nicotine and tar.

The light detecting organs in my head caught the sea. Large expanse of saline water surrounded me.

The morning sunlight hit on the surface. The water glistened and it looked like there were millions of diamonds on the sea. The sea was glittered with diamonds.

It was beautiful.

I could hear the waves splashed against the body of the ship.

Music of nature.

Splash – splash – splash…

Woooss – woooss – woooss…

Travel is like a pilgrimage, a journey or search of great moral significance. We live in a wonderful world that is full of beauty, charm, and adventure. When our own eyes see the physical beauty of Mother Nature or human creation, our own hearts feel the giving delight and arousing admiration of a foreign land’s charm, and our own souls experience the adventure of the journey; travel could be a journey to heightened a person’s beliefs and faith. We could appreciate the creation of The Higher Being and His mighty greatness.

Instead of going to a shrine, the world is the shrine.

As I drag a dose of my morning nicotine, I whispered…

"Masya Allah…"

***

Rome

Basilica, Vatican

Venice

Athens

Naples

Vatican

Giza

Ephesus, Turkey

Capri

Capri

Capri

Sicily - Godfather I Bar

Navigator of The Sea

On my way to Egypt

Laussez-Faire

In French, it literally means “let do” or “ let it be” or “leave it alone”. The phrase means allowing industry to be free of government restriction especially leash in form of tariffs and government monopolies.

I remember watching Li Ka Shing’s documentary and his first principle is acquiring liberal economy that allows free movement of asset and remittances that don’t require official approval. His second principle is freedom of personal movement. Deprivation of regulation liberty is the basis of both principles.

Why? The theory assumes that economic liberalism allows private property and individual contracts to act without any restrictions will produce the best results with provided with the least public information and existing justice. No one still should not cheat or steal.

Liberalism = Full development.

Same in life.

In order to gain one’s fullest potential, one must be allowed to be free of over bearing restriction.

Take Carl Rogers’ Self Theory in Humanistic Approach of psychology. Every individual is made up of an organism, which is what you were born with (your own belief: thoughts/feelings/physical/urges that struggle for perfection); and self, which is an image of what one is and what one values. The ideal self is what you want to become in order to meet the society demand.

The self depends on how others respond and approve or disapprove. The self, therefore, often starts conflict with the organism’s basic urge for perfection. If one receives positive regard, which is unconditional approval for what one is, one has true regard for oneself. If however approval is dependent on performing “good” (specific) behavior one sees oneself as being worthy only when behaving according conditions of worth.

According to Rogers’ theory in order to become a fully functioning person, one must learn to make the organism and self one by opening oneself to all experience. Having the freedom of choice, not being shackled by restrictions and being able to make choices more fluently.

Freedom = Full development.

So is liberalism in both economy and family upbringing is all good and no evil?

Remember, everything in excess is always defective.

You do still need guidance.

***

HIPMI - Lemhannas: Kelompok 8 Rajawali

HIPMI - Lemhannas: Gubernur Lemhannas

HIPMI - Lemhannas: Kelompok 8 Rajawali with Ketum EA & Sekjen

Rakernas: Batam

Rakernas: Opening Night

Nothing

I am no one. I am nothing.

I am a void left by the collapse of contentment.

I have nothing. I am nothing.

Everything I wear, I own, and I use are impermanent.

So don't bother.

I know exactly who I am,

I am no one who has nothing.

There is nowhere I could rest my carnal shell as the walls shield me from every danger of the outside world. Constant hazard always finds its way to harm my brief mental rest. Where can I find both physical ease and emotional state of comfort?

One day.

When the tangible does not matter anymore.

When my soul breaks free from my temporary flesh.

When the light shines bright at the end of the tunnel.

When the dream ends and the real life begins.

Eternally.

Commitment to ALL Aspects of life

For the past few months I’ve learned quite a whole lot about commitment. In definition, commitment refers to show loyalty, duty or pledge to something or someone.

A person’s character can be judged from the commitment delivered. And in order to hit the high scale on the character verdict, a person must show commitment in two aspects of life: personal and organizational.

The easiest way to see if someone takes commitment seriously is by showing up on time. Timeliness shows commitment. It shows you’re committed to your duty. Being late once with a legit reason is tolerable, but more than once it shows that you’re don’t respect the other person waiting for you and you can’t keep your word.

Personal commitment goes down to keeping your promises. You don’t have to be asked to spend time with your family. You support your family by being there even though your presence doesn’t make any difference; it only makes difference for them. You have the strength to say no to your friends because you’ve promised your family to spend time with them. You drop all of your schedules and tend to your sick family member. And you do it with no burden, you do it simply because you love them.

Personal commitment to your significant other? It’s simple. You’ve made the decision to be in a relationship, thus you’ve bounded yourself to an obligation that restricts freedom of action. You can’t go around club hopping all night without your partner’s permission, you can’t hang out with members of the opposite sex all you want, you don’t talk and act as if you’re single. You pick her up, drop her off, making sure she’s safe and sound. When you’re in a relationship, you’re committed to that one person: mind, body, and soul. You don’t say “I love you” but you go to Alexis with your guy friends or colleagues. It's hypocritical. That doesn’t show respect. It doesn’t show complete commitment.

Organizational commitment is commitment to your job and organizations. Showing a high standard of professional ethics, behavior and work activities deliver a high value of commitment. Getting the job done using your fullest potential, not only using your name to get respect, can gain people’s respect. Sooner or later, you will achieve what you’re aiming for.

It’s rare to find someone who’s committed to ALL aspects of life: family, relationship, job and organization.

One may be committed to their job but not to his/her relationship. Sure, you can gain status, but not necessarily respect. Someday, it can get back to him. “Oh, you can’t really trust him, he’s a womanizer” although he is being referred in a professional setting.

Let’s be rare.

Commit to your family, relationship, job and organization.

Then you can gain status and respect.

Mercy

I love war films. Any movies from ancient and fiction like Troy to modern and nonfiction like Black Hawk Down, anything that features a state of hostile armed conflict between different nations. Two of my favorites are Mel Gibson’s Brave Heart and The Patriot.

They teach you about humanity, moral, and ethics. They are the source of serious moral questions. Is war necessary for the defense of a country or is it just simply undesirable, problematic and does more damage than good? They also teach you about courage, honor, and true friendship.

There is something evidently significant after I watch a lot of war movies.

Conventional warfare was widely used before postmodern era. Kingdom of Heaven and Joan of Arc use conventional warfare. It’s a form of warfare conducted by using conventional military weapons and battlefield tactics in open confrontation. Two groups of army face each other on an open field and start attacking each other on cue. Modern people might think the move is lacking intelligence but at that time people think it’s an act of honor, facing your enemy man to man.

Moving on to postmodern era, nations started using unconventional warfare, such as:

Guerilla strategy is a less mobile and larger formal army is combated by a small group of combatants using mobile military tactics in form of ambushes and raids. Chemical weapon strategy uses intoxicating chemical substances to kill, injure, or incapacitate enemy.

My favorite series Band of Brothers uses unconventional warfare. Unconventional warfare attacks enemy when they least expect it thus creating more damage in crippling the enemy’s defense system.

In the world of today, conventional is hardly used. Facing your enemy man to man in an open field is considered as a chaotic strategy that leads to a waste of lives, time, and weapons.

Conventional or unconventional, lives are taken away. The most important thing is to show mercy when the enemy is waving the white flag and begging for their lives. The prisoners of war's families must swallow the bitter pill when they know their sons surrender but get killed anyway.

Mercy is not a sign of weakness but rather it’s a sign of great wisdom and strength. Being merciful is to show a meticulous understanding of life that go beyond facts, which are visibly presented. To grant clemency, in spite of bad actions and disparities, indicates an elevated consciousness to have the strength to say, “I forgive”

Besides, they’re not in war with the people, but they’re in war with the cause.

Niche Differentiation

For the last couple of days, my thoughts have been occupied with what I should do next?

Being alive in the 21^st century makes it hard to find the gap in the marketplace. Everything everybody needs is readily available. It’s mission impossible to invent a completely new product or service. What possible is to start something that’s already there but with competitive edge to manage sustaining position against competitors. Whether it’s price, quality or customer intimacy, any three could be used as competitive advantage.

When a new company excels than another, it’s subtracting profit from its competitors. That’s the way it is. It’s the natural selection of capitalism, if you will. While the real natural selection is the process by which traits that make it more likely for an organism to survive, natural selection of capitalism use competitive advantage to make it more likely to survive against competitors. There’s no way a new comer would think, “I won’t dive myself into that niche market because I don’t want to take their market share.”

This makes me think of niche differentiation. In ecology, niche differentiation is the process by which natural selection drives competing species into different patterns of resource use or different niches. In other words, species avoid competition by occupying different sections of resources. Take seven Anolis lizards that live in tropical rainforest as an example. They share insects as common food. They avoid competition by occupying different sections of the rainforest. They avoid competition by living on branches while others live on the ground.

According to Gause’s Law or competitive exclusion principle, two species competing for the same resources can’t coexist under stability if other ecological factors are constant. One competitor will overcome the other leading to the extinction of another.

Can we take ecological term of niche differentiation and apply it to the world of capitalism and consumerism?

Is it possible for entrepreneurs to avoid competition by moving into different niche market because they don’t want to take the existent market share?

Not likely.

Humans want to win. They want to take the majority of the market share leading to the extinction of competitors if it’s possible.

That’s how it goes.

Just do it the right way. No foul play. No use of winning if everybody is cursing on you.

I'm tired

I'm tired...

I want to sleep...

i want to rest my physical being on the most comfortable cushion ever made.

To snug the most important part of my human body on a cloth bag stuffed with thousands of fine feathers.

I'm tired, you see...

i close my windows to the world,

I have a pitch black stage upon my eyes,

Not the usual stage showing the colorful human drama.

As I drift to sleep...

I see stars as I fly higher in unconsciousness.

My body is light as a feather I sleep on,

My thin layer of tissue starts to glow brighter than a newborn star.

As I fly higher, my tangible presence is sucked into the intense darkness of night leaving a golden dust trail.

The light within me has been exposed after hiding in a pile of flesh.

No more weight,

No more burden of the flesh...

It's...

It's only...

Me...

Blessed With A Burden

Life is a continuous cycle of misery. Sometimes people blame themselves for the constant grief of despair that comes one after another. People don’t get what they deserve, people just get what they get and there’s nothing we can do about it. It’s human to make sense of everything, but the honest truth is that sometimes things just don’t make sense.

Some people make difficulty as passion, as something they have to conquer. And they see it as a blessing in a burden. A sick family member is time for the whole family to regroup and catch up. Getting fired from a job means an opportunity to explore something completely new. Breaking up with a long time boyfriend as a time for self-discovery.

Blessed by a burden? People don’t usually use those two words in the same sentence. We hardly find one blessing amidst all the burdens, and now burdens as blessings?

Is it just a positive way of looking at it? Or is it really only an illusion of truth?

Take fata morgana, which is an optical phenomenon that results from a temperature inversion, as an example. Dehydrated desert traveler spends his last few drops of energy running toward a non-existence mirage. Going toward something that’s only an illusion under distress.

But some of the most successful people view burdens as blessings. Bernie Marcus and Arthur Blank, the founders of Home Depot, both were fired from their jobs in the late 1970s to find their company that would keep values that were important to them. Today it’s the largest home-improvement retailer in the States, and the second largest general retailer behind Wal-Mart.

Maybe, it’s not an illusion. It’s a kick in the butt to stay strong and move on with your life.

There is a blessing in being burdened after all.

Saturday night

Everything Is Labeled But Everybody Is Not

When the rest of the body and the mind are resting on a Sunday, the eyes are prone to overwork themselves. All we do is just lay on our asses and watch TV from the second we regain consciousness until we fall back asleep again.

The newest episode of House Season 6 hasn’t came out yet so out of desperation I downloaded the complete season of MTV’s reality show The City. I love watching young modern office warriors working in chic clothes and killer heels they put on.

Anyway, there’s this girl in the show named Olivia. She’s the typical bitchy backstabber who you want to kill slowly kind of girl. On top of that, she’s a socialite. Yes, a social… what she likes to be abbreviated as. She labels people from what neighborhood they live in, clothes they put on, their last names, and what kind of friends they have. Her crowd doesn’t like to ‘mingle with the commoners’.

According to the dictionary (yes, I looked it up oh I’m such a loser), a socialite is a person who is well known in fashionable society and is fond of social activities and entertainment.

When you to a beauty salon anywhere in Jakarta you’ll see all these socialite magazines: Prestige, Tatler, Dewi… You see the same names, same people going to lux events carrying a bag that could feed an entire kampung and wearing designer clothes & shoes with brand names I can’t correctly pronounce. Do i want to be like them? Who doesn't want to be the young and the privileged... and on top of that beautiful?

Tangible goods labeled with certain brand may translate to a certain quality. People labeled with a certain stereotype may not translate to certain quality.

The fabric sewn together that clings on someone’s body or the type of crowd someone rolls with or the zipcode someone has written on the mail can’t determine that he or she is better or worse than you do. Mind, body, or soul.

EVERYTHING is labeled but EVERYBODY is not.

No Dancer

I walk having insulated wire hanging from my ears.

Bang bang bang.

I pick up the pace in harmony with the thumping sound of the bass. Faster. My hip suspends a little more to the left and right as I lift and setting down each foot. I would’ve moved my buns rhythmically to the music if there were not even a single set of eyes around me.

I’ve always wanted to be a dancer.

A sleek ballerina who does graceful and fluid movements, points her feet before she flies in the air. A hot Celtics dancer who does sexy dance moves during half time drooled over everyone in the court.

All I do is dance randomly with music blasting from my speaker while I get ready before I go out. Or do weird hand gestures when my favorite song goes on in the club.

I’m no ballerina, I’m no hot dancer.

But he doesn’t get away from me and pretend not to know me when I do my bizarre series of movement.

He likes the way I am.

And that's one of the reasons i love him for.

Ecstacy

I took a drag of nicotine under the absence of light along with the noisy crowd of intoxicated sinners. Tipsy, they said, but I didn’t fly high. After years of gulping down gallons and gallons of poisonous substance, my immunity toward alcohol improved. My long time wish to detoxify the physical part of me to bring back the sensation of a virgin drinker couldn’t be done since I can’t live a week as a vegan.

I was in temporary ecstasy.

An hour of effort getting all dolled up diminished an hour after I stepped into the darkness to do dark deeds. My hair tangled, my liner smudged, and my blush gone.

But I didn’t bother to haul my 5-inch heels to the little girl’s room to powder my nose because…

the person who I put my make up on for wasn’t there beside me,

the person who I dress up for wasn’t there beside me,

the person who I care the most wasn’t there beside me.

Why was I there?

Stupidity. Immaturity.

People say life is a rollercoaster. I must say that the past (almost) 2 months has been a wonderful ride. There were ups and downs, twists and turns, but the main attraction of the ride was that I wasn’t riding it alone. Under the rain or sun, I rode it with someone who I can scream with, laugh with, cry with, or smile with.

I used to walk around with clouds above my head. Fear stimulates negative imagination therefore I seek momentary pleasures to block happy hormones from escaping. Unpleasant emotion of losing a hint of joy runs through my veins.

You touched me.

The clouds above my head begin to lift a little.

You touched me. 

Pleasant emotion of having the real joy runs through my veins.

Some say that sex is the closest two people can be. It’s an illusion of truth because thought is real and physical is the illusion. Sex is the closest you can ever be to know everything about his anatomy not his true self, an image of what he is and what he values. Therefore, let’s make love.

Yes, make love.

You own my heart,

Whatever you do or don’t have,

You’re always in my heart.

I don’t need other passengers joining our ride.

Just you and me is plenty.

I’m in real ecstasy.

The twists, the turns, the ups and downs,

Hold my hand tightly,

Let’s enjoy the ride.

Private VS Public

“Fortunately we’re not a public company – we’re a private group of companies, and I can do what I want” – Richard Branson.

Mr. Boss once said that he would never go public for any of his companies. And one of my business idols convinced me never to go public also.

CEOs at publicly owned companies are constrained by their need to balance multiple objectives the ecosystem of their corporation. While private owners have more flexibility in putting their principles and creativities into their realm of businesses.

I want to be an entrepreneur in the first place because I want to create a new venture by filling the gap in the market place. I have a lot of ideas in my mind and it will continually change as trend, technology and consumer demand revolutionize over time.

If I were constrained by the need of approval from shareholders before I could change one little thing to make the business better, it would be inflexible. Not only for the better of the business but also for the employees.

I need full flexibility.

Call me a capitalist, but I’m a market entrepreneur as well a social entrepreneur. 

Time Comes With Opportunities & Risks

Time is an extremely miraculous thing.

In such a short measured progress of past to future a lot of things can happen or oppositely stagnant.

For me the last couple of weeks life had been a roller coaster not a smooth sailing through the ocean. The ride had a lot of twists and turns, ups and downs, fear and excitement all cramped together in the length of 2 weeks time.

Time is the greatest luxury anyone can have that you can’t repeat. You waste a second then you lose that second forever.

And time is full of opportunities. Great opportunities come with great risks. Yes, dreading about the possible danger of taking a chance will be always there.

But if you don’t risk anything you risk even more.

I would follow my intuition and take this risk and maybe, just maybe, I will be pleased in the future that I didn’t pass on this chance.

If not, life is full of opportunities. I’ll just grab another one.

Awake

The usual visibility of separate liquid drops cannot be seen in the darkness of night as I draw the thick green curtain to witness the rain. I climb back to the bed to enjoy the calming sound of its drippings onto Mother Earth’s surface. A loud rumbling noise pierces my ears and I grab the blanket to cover my entire flesh.

The battle between wanting to enjoy the song of nature and Coldplay’s Fix You heightens. I decide to wear the electrical device and close my windows to the world. In total blackout of my vision, my thoughts still float around.  I imagine shooting the thoughts with warm bullets and put them to rest eternally.

My windows to the world are wide open in total absence of light.

I am awake.

I change the song.

“Don’t want to close my eyes

I don’t want to fall asleep

Cause I’d miss you Baby

And I don’t want to miss a thing

Cause even when I dream of you

The sweetest dream will never do

I’d still miss you Baby

And I don’t want to miss a thing”

- Aerosmith

Perfection is Imperfection

I spent 48 hours nonstop watching The West Wing when I became fully aware of something as a fact.

The character, President Bartlett (Martin Sheen), lives everyday under the pressure to make important decisions that affect the lives of millions, if not, billions of people. He decides whether to fund US$500 million to public schools or cancer research, to send a rescue military team to save a jet fighter pilot who is shot down in Afghanistan with the risk of losing the whole rescue team, to fire a distinguished White House Chief of Staff who is also his best friend for 40 years because he was an alcoholic.

This is when I became fully understand that we couldn’t have PERFECTION.

All of you business graduates must know what opportunity cost is. It’s the value of the next best alternative forgone as the result of making a decision.

A person who sells his car 5 years after he first bought it denies himself to the opportunity to sell the car earlier without the 5 years depreciated value.

Let’s translate it in real life. Simple example, the opportunity cost of eating your favorite meal of spaghetti at a restaurant is trying the restaurant’s famous filet mignon.

As they say, “We can’t afford to have everything we want.”

The statement is true for a human being too.

You can’t expect an individual to have all the desired qualities and characteristics.

If you wait your whole life waiting for the perfect one, you’ll find it when you’re in your grave. It’s when you find God.

But if you wish to accept someone, and help him/her to change for the better, being supportive and continually encourage the progress, you can eventually find perfection. Don’t make a sudden rage & haze at a middle of a progress. The other person will lose his/her spirit.

Perfection is imperfection.

Because if you only have perfection, there's no more satisfaction. You won't understand what satisfaction is when you only have all the goodness in life. You must experience desperation, evil and disappointment to value the opposite.

You find perfection by understanding the imperfections.
Being at peace with the imperfections.
Then you’ll find true happiness.

“The day is over. We live to fight another one,” President Bartlett from The West Wing.

Continue the fight for the better, don’t leave all the progress to waste.

You know what they say: FOR THE BETTER AND FOR THE WORSE.

Not only 'for the better'.

Death Poem

I don’t get it. I really don’t get it.
Could anybody please tell me why?
Am I not a good person? Am I a bad person?
I'm trying hard. I really am.
I need a pat on my back.

***

Ketika ada sepasang kaki baru berpijak di permukaan bumi,
Ketika ada tangisan baru menggelegar di udara bumi,
Ketika manusia baru terlahir di dunia maya,
Sesungguhnya dia tidak terlahir.

Mungkin neraka sesungguhnya adalah dunia itu sendiri.
Penyakit demi penyakit datang bertubi-tubi.
Menghantam yang direstui maupun yang dikecam.

Manusia oh manusia. Kasihanilah manusia.

Seekor zebra diterkam harimau. Matilah dia.
Seorang manusia diterkam hatinya. Matilah dia.
Zebra mati sakit. Manusia mati sakit.
Hati pecah berkeping-keping? Hanya penyakit manusia.

Mungkin lebih baik aku tak pernah terlahir.